To The Perinatal Parent: You are Not Alone by Lauren Oster, MA, LCPC, PMH-C
Change is essential. Change is meaningful. Change is to be expected as our minds and bodies shift into the new season of parenthood. What a testament to our resilience in life! This transformative time also places parents (biological, adoptive, and surrogate) at risk for developing perinatal mental health issues. Each individual has their own experience in becoming a parent, and the hope is that together we can foster a welcoming community where no one has to go through it alone.
When Is the Perinatal Period?
Antenatal (prenatal): before birth
Postnatal (postpartum): after birth
Perinatal: the timeline from conception through the first year of birth
The perinatal timeline requires navigation of growth and development, both for the baby and the parent(s). Mental health conditions can begin at any point along the timeline. It is also important to consider that a combination of hereditary, environmental, and situational factors may play a role in the overall development of issues. Additional examples of risk factors include a personal history of perinatal mental health disorders, fertility complications, infant loss, inadequate social support, and unmanaged stress.
Common Maternal Mental Health Disorders (MMH Disorders)
The baby blues, perinatal mood and anxiety disorders (PMADS), postpartum psychosis, and post-traumatic stress disorder are more commonly referenced topics. Much of the published research is about women, yet men can also experience paternal mental health issues. You can find a more complete list here.
Let’s look in more detail at what is assessed when identifying a condition. The duration of the baby blues does not last more than two weeks postpartum. Symptoms of the baby blues such as sleeplessness, crying, and irritability are undoubtedly a challenge, although they are typically considered milder in severity. Unlike other MMH disorders, the baby blues resolves without medical attention.
Duration, symptoms, severity, and medical attention are viewed in combination with how they impact each person’s functioning. The difference between what is typical for a new parent to experience as opposed to a diagnosis, can be confirmed by your doctor or a qualified professional.
The Importance of Screening
In reading this blog, you have already taken the first step by educating yourself about the basics of perinatal mental health. Beyond awareness comes the necessity of regular screenings.
Ideally a doctor or trained professional is providing screenings during various stages of care and discussing the results in a considerate manner. If you or a loved one has not been screened, please advocate for it to be provided. Also, a doctor can rule out other medical conditions that may have overlapping symptoms with perinatal mental health disorders. Among many screening tools, the Edinburgh Postnatal Depression Scale (EPDS) and the Patient Health Questionnaire (PHQ-9) are proven to be reliable and valid. If the results from a screening should indicate an intervention, the administering professional will have resources for you.
You Do Not Have to Parent Alone
The parenthood journey was not meant to be walked alone, and the presence of helpful people may lighten the load. While the solid foundation of a support system is crucial, it does not fully prevent perinatal mental health disorders. We do not want to assume what someone is going through, therefore, sincerely inviting them to share their experiences opens the door for authentic conversation.
There have been many times in my personal parenting journey when I needed reminders that I was not the only one with dirty dishes in the sink. I was not the only one who went more days than I would like to admit without washing my hair. All of my experiences are valid because they are my own yet I was not alone, and communication with supportive people in my life made a difference.
“Some days, doing ‘the best we can’ may still fall short of what we would like to be able to do, but life isn’t perfect on any front — and doing what we can with what we have is the most we should expect of ourselves.” -Fred Rodgers
Where to Find Support
A village of helpers can include family, neighbors, friends, coworkers, and professionals. We truly need multiple resources in different seasons of our life!
There are reputable online sites with information to assist various groups of people. Another remote option is a hotline such as the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline: 1-833-852-6262 (English/Spanish). Also, support groups exist to offer guidance while feeling less isolated. Imagine how empowering it is to shift into a truer version of yourself in the process of healing. Therapists can provide healing support as we intentionally practice creating a safe, nonjudgmental space for others to share their stories.
If you are not in a season of finding your village, take a moment to practice gratitude for your current support system or go show up in a helpful manner for someone else’s parenting journey.
The Benefits of Receiving Perinatal Support
Allows time to heal physically as well as adjust to changing hormones
Helps connect to a community or seek out a helpful community
Better able to meet one’s own needs and the needs of the child(ren)
Increases the ability to maintain healthy sleep hygiene, nourish the body adequately, and practice movements that feel good
Provides an opportunity to be present with emotions
Advocates for daily tasks to be completed by a support member
Invites the parent to see themselves as a human with roles and interests outside of parenthood
The perinatal period is a vulnerable time and each person is deserving of compassion during the changes that occur. Remember that you are not alone in this journey and perinatal mental health disorders are treatable! “The point of parenting is not to have all of the answers before we start out but instead to figure it out on the go as our children grow. Because as they do, so will we.” -Bridgett Miller
To learn more or connect with someone from our team please reach out to Lotus Therapy Group at 708-552-7330.
